Page 54 - IJPS-10-2

International Journal of
Population Studies Experience of bereavement by suicide in later life

perceived their situated relationships and networks in both their own identities and how they negotiated different
personal and professional settings (Matua & Van de Wal, relationships with their loved ones – which were often
2015). This constant comparison (Miles & Huberman, combined with the necessity of taking up new roles,
1994) helped uncover participants’ meanings and further although not always voluntarily, to support those left
understandings toward phenomenology (Charmaz, 2006). behind.
The team observed data saturation after approximately 17 The temporality of their experience appeared to
interviews. While some participants did talk about the follow phases commonly described in bereavement
time that elapsed since the bereavement spontaneously and trauma research. There gave rise to rich, vivid, and
in their interview, this was not a direct question and, in visceral descriptions of the participants learning about the
hindsight, this would be a variable useful for describing suicide and its immediate aftermath such as severe shock,
different experiences.
numbness, and sometimes disembodied experiences due
2.3. Ethics to acute psychological trauma (Neimeyer & Sands, 2017).
Some participants reflected critically on the content of
Ethical approval was provided by the University of the grief itself, focusing on (Jordan, 2001) how it was
Strathclyde Ethics Committee. A key ethical consideration dramatically different from their other experiences of
was the impact of talking about bereavement and suicide bereavement and loss experience through embodiment.
on researchers and participants (McKenzie et al., 2017). These often involved agonizing self-questioning,
The protocol drew on established guidance for working self-stigmatization, and isolation, and the significance
with people bereaved by suicide (Samaritans, 2020), of such a life-changing event in their life course. Many
which included a structured debriefing and signposting reflected on whether it was possible to ever get back to the
support for participants. We established processes for person that they were:
the peer researchers through training on interviewing
techniques and data analysis. One team member was a “Something that is really pissing me off at the moment is
digital artist, and the team concluded the project with this thing about post-traumatic growth. And, you know,
a workshop using visualization techniques to debrief it’s these little memes, you know, that imply you’ve come
and share their experiences of working with sensitive of it better and stronger, you know, or a nicer person….
and distressing experiences. Team members also had But I just think, I was quite a nice person before, you
access to a clinical psychologist. The team established a know? I didn’t need this to make me grow….the way
project advisory group comprising members working in I would describe getting over [Name 55:14]’s death
suicide prevention, bereavement support, mental health is, you know, if you see a tree that’s grown next to a
social work, and a lay older person. This group reviewed barbed wire fence, and it sort of grows across, so that
the research protocol and tools and commented on the the barbed wire’s going through the middle of it, and it
findings from the interim report (Hafford-Letchfield comes out either side?……that’s what it feels like to me.
et al., 2022b). Six weeks after the interviews took place, we So, on the outside it’s all healthy, but inside that barbed
invited participants to complete a short survey on their wire will always be there….and trees grow quite slowly.”
experiences of taking part in the research and 16 people (Grandmother, 60 – 64 years old)
responded. This participant’s suicide loss had coincided with her plans
3. Key findings for retirement and alongside other participants, she reflected
a mixture of anger, despair, and anxiety about the constant
Here, we discuss the data that underpinned two relevant presence of psychological pain and her loss of control over
themes addressing the research questions: (i) the centrality her future. Other elements of her narrative on her expressive
of experience, critical reflection, and meaning making in needs illustrated an intolerance of being subject to what she
later life following suicide trauma and (ii) the journey of considered to be inauthentic communication from others
discovery and how this interacted with social and political which belied a discomfort or dismissal of her experience and
rights in later life. her need to internalize and manage the effects as a result.

3.1. The centrality of experience, critical reflection, and When reflecting on their individual potential for
meaning making in later life following suicide trauma recovery and the investment and learning needed to
develop better coping strategies going forward, another
As shown in Table 1, participants had experienced
bereavement by suicide in different points in their lives. said:
Their narratives were dynamic with constant emerging “Well, I was thinking about this thing about being over
and changing perspectives – about the person who died, 60 because I’m just wondering if age, I mean there are

Volume 10 Issue 2 (2024) 48 https://doi.org/10.36922/ijps.0777